Check Up

Check up, also known as doctor's appointment, will be part of my life now. I had my check up with my oncologist last Tuesday, the first since I finished my chemotherapy.

I asked about diet, exercise and diet supplements. I also have to deal with the fact that I may not have amenorrhea (absence of menstrual cycle) yet. Something very undesirable. With chemotherapy, my menstruation is supposed to stop after the 2nd or 3rd cycle. This is the desired reaction as my cancer is hormone receptive. With chemotherapy, my estrogen levels are supposed to go down to the point that I will be amenorrheic. The longer, the better - the lesser chance of recurrence. Early menopause, is the other (kinder, too) name of this forced medical condition. I, however, have not gone into that stage. So, my doctor gave me two options if I menstruate again this month - surgical removal of my ovaries or I get injected with some drug every four weeks.

After hearing the possibility of yet another surgery, my logical side begun to shut down again. Refusing to digest any more information. I have to struggle to understand my doctor's explanation since after the word surgery, my doctor's voice started to warble. I was thinking: oh, man! My 2nd hospitalization and it will be another surgery! Another surgery that will be labelled as "catastrophic" by the medicare/Philippine Health Insurance. Catastrophic indeed! Imagine having another "meltdown"! Embarrasing!

Somehow, I managed to survive the appointment. Thankfully, I have asked all the questions (I think) I wanted about other stuff before we touched on the possibility of surgery. And as I wait (something I'm getting to be an expert at), I'll try not to think about it.

Being a girl/woman is REALLY complicated; spins my head around!