Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Touching Base

In the past 3 months, friends, acquaintances, and high school classmates have been popping out of the woodworks trying to touch base with me. It kinda makes me wonder if I am to pass into another realm or into oblivion soon.

I can't but help think this, especially when the fellow survivors I know are having recurrences. Some have frights, but were eventually declared to be still in remission, others do find metastases. I feel sad and apprehensive. Sad for those who have recurrence after less than 2 years from their last treatment, and apprenhensive for myself. The thought kept popping up: What if I'm next? Can I be as brave as these people?

I would like to believe that I will be in remission for the rest of my life, and until the 5-year mark has passed, I will still have to live in constant apprehension. However, I would just like to have faith and believe that I am healed - for life, for I refuse to live in the shadow of constant fear.

No comments: