Tuesdays with Morrie

This is one of the best books I've read, Tuesdays with Morrie.

It has reinforced what I believed in - that people who are dying are the bravest, the most uncomplicated people in the world. They know what they want and they tend to accomplish as much as possible with the precious time they have left. They are the most generous, the most understanding people.

Morrie Schwartz have lived a full life. The most memorable days were his last days on Earth. He was, indeed, a teacher in the truest sense of the word. I may not know him personally, but he has touched me with his teachings. He made life so simple, something I have been striving to do with my own. Even after his death, Morrie Schwartz continues to teach people how to life live to the fullest. I am humbled by his teachings.

Are you still seeking for answers? Read Tuesdays with Morrie. For me, this is a far better book than Rich Dad, Poor Dad. Morrie Schwartz was, and still is, a far better teacher than Robert Kiyosaki. I appreciate what Mr. Kiyosaki is trying to teach the world, who would not want to be rich? But I think Mr. Schwartz was far richer than Mr. Kiyosaki, maybe not in dollar and cents, but certainly in life, friendship, and love - and these were the things that sustained him.

Happy New Year, everyone! Have a simple life ahead!

Christmas Gift

What is the best Christmas gift ever that you have received?

I got a Christmas card from my dear, dear friends in the States yesterday. Oh, what joy! How thoughtful. They sent me the card to wish me happy holidays and also to tell me the news that they're expecting a little girl! I just hope the baby will look like the mom. *grin* They said that this is their best Christmas gift ever. I believe them.

Today, I got a gift from my godmother. I am so blessed to have her as my godmother. She has helped me A LOT with my sickness this year. She would visit or call me up, checking on me, to see how I am doing, how am I coping.

Admittedly, I went through a lot this year. The surgery, the treatments, the scares, the learning processes everyday, and yet, I was able to overcome these obstacles with help from family and friends. Life is sweeter everyday.

I think this year, the entire year is one big christmas for me and it's the best christmas, ever!

Merry Christmas, Everyone!

Today, I'm officially on leave from the office. Tomorrow, I'll be hopping on a plane to Cagayan de Oro (finally!), and I still have tons of stuff to plow through today. I don't think I'll be able to finish all the stuff that I'm supposed to do. I hope I can look forward to some ten days of R & R. Well, sort of, since I think I may be delusional with what's ahead for me in the next ten days or so.

I have tons of assignments to deal with (I can spend my entire holiday doing the assignments!), of course, there's also the whirlwind of parties, the "must attend" ones. Between these, I plan to go visit an aunt, who I hope will be in Cagayan de Oro sometime during my visit so that I can see her; and of course, I have to see the baby of my cousin, who also happens to be one of my goddaughters. I have to remember, too, to go see my good surgeon!

How could I leave out the visitors? Beginning on December 25th, the four of us siblings will be expecting and entertaining visitors from Manila. Anyone here think I can do my assignment at this time? I don't. Mwahahaha. It's going to be a riot of a Christmas. =)

Oh, it is indeed a full vacation ahead.

Christmas Wish List

"So, what do you want for Christmas?" is the most encountered question I have these days.

My standard answer is: "Peace on earth and goodwill to men!" My, my, I can join beauty pageants with my answer.

What can I possibly want for Christmas?

Material things the I want are more "luxury" than needs. With the christmas party here at the dorm, I was able to cross off a couple - I got the book Tuesdays with Morrie, a book that I've been meaning to buy to read but somehow wasn't able to and I was also able to go to Boracay this year (thank you again, girls!). Other things on my list are just material things, your everyday gadgets that one can live with or without, things that I have to save up for myself. =)

Actually, I had my christmas gift early when all my test results came back "normal." Even the scare with the cyst in my ovary have been relegated to the back seat for the meantime. I've got good health once again, I think it is enough.

Christmas Party Time!

Tomorrow, I have 3 christmas parties lined up. At 4pm, there is the christmas party at school. Then, at 6pm, the party at the office will start. Finally, at 7pm, the party at the dorm will start.

At 4pm, I will still be at the office. At 6pm, I will be at school. At 11pm, I will be home from school. I guess I will just have to miss out on ALL of the parties! It will be a bizaare day tomorrow - with 3 parties, none of which I can attend. Funny?

On Saturday, there will be another christmas party, this time with the badminton people - and I have to be at work. I think this sucks, 4 parties all lined up, and I will be at NONE of them. Well, let's look at the bright side, I'll start partying when I go home to Cagayan de Oro for the holidays. Maybe I won't gain so much weight - since I'm NOT even supposed to gain a single pound according to my oncologist!

One more week, and I'll be heading for Cagayan de Oro. I can't wait!

Scrooge

Bah, hambug!

Two more weeks and it's Christmas. Up until today, I have yet to find the Christmas spirit in me. By this time, I'm usually wrapping my gifts and might have even given some out, but this year, it's a different story entirely.

I am in a time warp. In my mind, I'm always a week ahead (I thought I am going home next Saturday!), which will constantly throw me into a panic, for I'm still not done with my Christmas shopping. What Christmas shopping? I haven't even completed my list. Yet, after realizing the correct date, I'm left scratching my head, wondering why there's all these extra activities in the shopping malls! Maybe school and work kinda leave me in a daze.

I attended the Christmas party of I Can Serve today, hoping that somehow I'll be infected with the holiday spirit and cheer. No such luck. It's just the realization of what date it is that propels me into action, wondering what I can get for my godchildren. I went to the mall today, in an attempt to look for gifts, and I ended up watching 2 movies and buying a book for myself. So much for making a dent into the list.

Perhaps I'll just give a hug and a kiss as gift. I'll get into the holiday spirit and cheer, I'm just a bit late this year.

Bah, hambug!

Bone Scan Results

I went to PGH (Philippine General Hospital) yesterday to get the results of my bone scan and to have my ultrasound as well. When I got my bone scan results, I was quite amused with the film. On the film were 4 exposures of my skeleton, from head to toe. What I find amusing is that the film is smaller than the letter size bond paper. I think my skeleton looked like that of Tinkerbell's. =) Wishing!

After getting my results, I went to have the dreaded ultrasound. The doctor saw the mass right away, but the size is now 6.1 x 5.8 x 5.7 cm. It seemed that the mass have grown from 4.5 cm to 6.1cm in 10 days! If I am the fainting kind of girl, I would have fainted. If I am a hysterical kind of girl, I would have gone into hysterics and probably got myself a shot to calm me down (maybe I should try this next time). Since I am neither, my heart just stopped for, oh, probably 5 seconds before racing at full speed. I have to conciously breathe deeply to calm myself down.

My OB-GYN was kind enough to drop by the ultrasound to see me right away. After conferring with the other doctor, she pronounced that they BELIEVE the cyst to be physiological in origin. That the cyst grew so fast in size also have an explanation: The CT scan's measurement might not be as accurate as that of ultrasound. Nothing to worry about, but we still have to monitor it. I am to see her again in 3 months' time. I left the hospital with mixed emotions. Relieved that there is no required operation for the cyst, but at the same time still apprehensive and worried about it.

Well, I guess I should just forget all about it with the holidays coming up, and worry about it again in February. By the way, on my bone scan report, the line following the word INTERPRETATION is as follows: Normal whole body bone scan. Yay! =)

Bone Scan

Tuesday morning, I texted my Oncologist and OB-GYN/Onco about the CT scan results. My oncologist texted back and told me that there's nothing to worry about. My OB-GYN said okay to my question if I can see her on Thursday. I have my bone scan scheduled on Thursday morning, I figured that I could go see her after the scan.

Thursday, I woke up early yet again, but this time, it is because my bone scan was scheduled at 7AM. When I got to the hospital, still bleary-eyed from lack of sleep, I found that there were already several patients there, all scheduled to have bone scan, too. All at 7AM! Hah! Why do the hospitals do that? They will tell you to come in at a certain time, and then you find out when you're there that it is on a first come, first served basis. I was too sleepy to complain so I just submitted my receipt (proof of payment) and waited for my name to be called. Finally, by 830, I heard my name. I was injected with the radioactive contrast dye, and then told to come back in 2 hours. Why? (in a whiny voice)

Apparently, it takes 2 hours for the dye to travel all over the body. OK. I asked how long the procedure will be, they answered that it's going to take 40-50 minutes per patient. In the meantime, I was told to keep away from pregnant women and kids. *Evil laughter* Oh, if only I can see a brat throwing a tantrum, I will give a deadly bear hug to that kid. Hehehe.

I went back home, had brunch and then went back to the hospital at 11AM, figuring that if I go there later, my wait won't be as long. I was also contemplating if I should call on my friends in PGH to help me out-meaning, I'll be placed in front of the line. As I looked around at my fellow patients waiting for their turn, I realized that I can't do such thing. I do not have the heart to bump off ladies in wheelchairs who are at least 65 years old. So, I wait. I read. I slept as well. By 12NN, I went to check how many patients are there before me. There's 2, roughly 2 hours before it's my turn.

I decided to go see my OB-GYN first. She is not too worried about the cyst (if the cyst grows into 8 cm in diameter, that's the time we start worrying), although she agreed with me that I have an ultrasound so we can know the characterics of the cyst. The ultrasound is scheduled for Tuesday this week. That consultation done, I went back to the hospital.

I waited for 30 more minutes and then it was finally my turn. My bone scan was done by 3:30PM.

I'll get the results tomorrow.

CT Scan Results

Monday was a holiday, so I took my time in going to the lab to get my CT scan results. I woke up early again, a sure sign of my being apprehensive. I am hoping that nothing will show up on the scan.

I also had my breast ultrasound after the CT scan procedure that Saturday. The results were good. Nothing showed up.

Around lunch time, I went to the lab to get my results. After signing on the receipt logbook, I took a deep breathe and sat myself down on one of the numerous benches there. Here goes nothing:

(I'm going to copy here the typed report)
1. There are some small metallic densities in the upper chest and breast, for which they concluded that these were probably markers for radiation therapy located in the site of previous surgery.
2. There were no infiltrates nor masses. No pleural fluid is noted.
3. The mediastinal vascular structures and heart are intact. No enlarged nodes are seen.
4. The osseous and the rest of the soft tissue structures of the thorax are unremarkable.
5. The liver is normal in size. It shows a diffuse decrease in attenuation with associated relative hyperdensity of the hepatic vasculature. The intrahepatic ducts are not dilated. No focal lesions are noted.
6. There is a cystic mass adjacent to the right side of the uterus. It measures 4.5 cm in diameter.
7. The pancreas and spleen are of normal size and tissue homogeneity. There are no focal masses noted within. The gallbladder is unremarkable.
8. The aorta and IVC are intact. There are no enlarged lymph nodes noted. The adrenal glands are normal.
9. The non-enhanced kidneys are normal in size. The urinary collecting structures are intact. The urinary bladder is partially filled with no remarkable findings noted.
10. The contrasts filled bowels are unremarkable. There are no mesenteric nodularites or thickening seen.
11. The uterus is not enarged.
12. The rest of the soft tissue, vascular and osseous structures are normal.
IMPRESSION:
1. Fatty liver infiltration.
2. Right adnexal cyst, probably ovarian in origin; suggest further evaluation with ultrasound.
3. No significant pulmunary findings.

Now, wasn't the quite something? Big words again. They can really make your vision blurry. and then they focused again on a sentence: There is a cystic mass adjacent to the right side of the uterus. It measures 4.5 cm in diameter. Whada?

Good thing I was sitting down on the bench. I went home in a daze, and somehow managed to plod through the day.

CT Scan

Last Saturday morning, November 26, I woke up earlier than usual. At first, I felt a bit disoriented and bewildered why I woke up that early. Ahh, yes! The CT scan. I noticed that whenever I needed something done, I would always wake up early. I woke up early for my operation. I woke up early for my chemo treatments. I woke up early for my CT scan. I think the only thing that I didn't wake up early for are the RT treatments.

I was apprehensive (again) for the scan. I was hoping that I won't be freaking out or that my phobia won't set in once I'm on for the scan. I even developed a strategy in my mind: I will close my eyes during the process and think happy thoughts! =)

Upon reaching the diagnostic lab, I found out that I am only to have plain CT scan as per doctor's orders. The fee will be a bit less, and I only have to drink around 1.5 liters of water, which has the contrast dye mixed in, within an hour. Woohoo! I gingerly tasted the water. Oh, good! It doesn't taste like medicine. Woohoo again. They say luck comes in 3's. After an hour, when I entered the room to have the scan, I could not believe my eyes! Yes! The machine is not one of those monstrous cave-like traps, but rather it looks like a table with a wide hoop. Triple woohoo! I wanted to kiss the machine! Yeah! I would not have to worry about being claustrophobic anymore. Tumdeedum!

Again, I would repeat, they say luck comes in 3's. I already had 3 good things. Will my good luck hold out?

I was told to change into a hospital gown, but I get to keep my undies on. The technician mumbled something which I did not quite catch, but it sure sound suspiciously something like "rectal", and then he left the room to let me change. After the technician left, and I was left wondering if I heard him right. The technician came in again after a few minutes. He had added more water to the bottle. I'm to drink that again? Ok then. Well, apparently not, that mixture is to go into my body not orally but rectally! Oh, man! I wanted to bolt for the door and would have done so if I wasn't lying down on the table. Dang! No wonder the technician was mumbling earlier. He must have had patients running out on him. Oh, boy!

So I took a deep breath, I suffered that, and had the procedure done. I got the results of my chest and whole abdomen CT scan last Monday.